I would like to make a public health announcement: Tikka Pukka Pukkas – drink with caution.

They look innocent enough, which is what lures you into a false sense of security. How lethal can a pink drink that is garnished with a pretty white flower possibly be? And the staff at Trader Vic’s always serve them to you with a big, genuine smile. I realise now why they’re smiling; they know exactly what is coming. Sip after sip you’re succumbing to your slow, humiliating demise.

Try one, if you dare, and see what happens. If you’re even braver, try a couple. If you’re just plain stupid, like I was last night, have four.

After one you feel like Peter Pan on speed.

After two you feel like you’re sexy and you know it.

After three you feel like your whole world is imploding.

After four you no longer feel a thing.

Don’t say I didn’t warn you.

 

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